It is the nothing which holds the everything. It is the all which holds the parts

A release of writing. Music calms my foolishness I have deemed a soul.

We take paths that we think we need. My path is to no longer believe that love is real.

People are too selfish. I am too selfish. I have a belief that loves comes from what I produce rather then who I am.

I need to reach the point of nothingness. How to get there? I'm not sure.

Answer- I have heard the crying of your heart. I have seen the searching of your soul. I know how deeply you have desired the truth.

I will speak to you if you listen.

The next two weeks I'm going to listen. I'm going to hear what is being said. I'm sitting here with dried tears to be checks. My body physically exhausted from my workout this morning. A motorcycle is passing the house. I miss bikes. I miss getting my nails done. I miss dressing up with trista and heading out.

I miss being the responsible one of the two of us. I hate this limbo i feel. I need to keep focusing on what I've always wanted. Volunteering. Esperance. Traveling. I can't wait for wednesday. After my meeting at 9 I'll know what is expected of me. And what I have to offer.

Xoxoxoxox